Life is a treasure hunt

Today I had this insight that life is a journey where you discover what you already posess even before you where born, meaning everything you might want is already waiting for you. We already have everything, we were born like this, we were born rich, beautiful, and whatever else people desire to have in their life. All these are created already, we only have to discover them, to recognize them and to accept them into our life.


It is like a treasure hunt: you believe there is a treasure, you are excited about the journey, and take action by preparing for the journey and doing whatever it takes to find the treasure and you don´t give up until you find it, no matter how long it takes or how hard it is, because you know that in the end is all worth it. And it is the same, with everything we want to achieve in life. Whatever you decide it is important for you, you first have to believe that it is already there, waiting for you, you have to take action and prepare for it, and confront every obstacle in your way with bravery until you achieve your goal, objective or vision.

And as excited we are about a new discovery or treasure hunt, we should also be as excited about our life. And how exciting treasure hunts are!!Aren´t they?:=)

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What is reality?

People often say: You should be more realistic about your goals! Stop dreaming! You are living in a world of fantasy!

What is really this reality that we are living in? How real is it?

We believe that life is hard, and things don’t come easy, we believe that we need to have a 9 to 5 office job to have enough money and to be happy, we believe we don’t have enough power to change things, we believe we are small and our opinion doesn’t counts, and we believe that we need to act in a certain way for people to accept us, that we should not trust strangers, we believe what we see in TV, we believe that life is a struggle, and we believe in wars, we believe that the world is dangerous….and so many other things that we believe about ourselves and the other, and about life and the world. But, how many of these are actually true? Why don’t we take responsability for what happens in the world and in our life?Why don’t we accept that we together as human beings are creating everything that is happening in the world? Just look at how many things we have built together as humanity in the last century? corporations, imposing buildings and skykrapers, megacities, supermachines, super intelligent computers, but also war, fight and struggle. Can we accept that every little thing that we do, our job, our thoughts, our beliefs, our actions, our conversations create a little bit of the world we live in and together we create the reality on this planet. We have so much power and our actions impact the world much more than we want to believe and not accepting it is iresponsabile.

What do I believe in?

As ABBA would say I believe in angels!

I believe in fairytales! Sometimes when I look at people I see them as characters from fairytales and I see the truth of who they really are.

I believe I am Snow White!

I believe in people and I love them just because we are all human beings which are all connected and part of the same tapestry!

I belive in past lives! I believe that the soul never dies!

I believe in Quantum Physics!

I believe that everyone is born with a certain role and purpose for this life.

I belive that there is that one special person just for me!

What do you believe in?

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In the pursuit of happiness?

The lasts weeks I had the worst time of my life. I have not been so depressed in a very long time. I been uncounciosly sabotaging myself or maybe counciounsly, it’s difficult to say: for the first time in my life I have absolutely no money, the person I loved left me, I’ve quit my job, I left my country, I left my family, my friends, I have no activities, no goals, no purpose anymore. Indeed lot of negative premieres. After pursuing all kind of materialistic goals like most people: career, money, a house, a great relationship, beauty, to be respected and admired, to be the smartest, with the fastest success and so on, I am left completely empty and disappointed in realizing that any of these have not made me satisfied, happy or fulfiled in any way. I’ve been in so many different states, wishing and setting all the goals we can possible see in the world around us. Reading and learning about personal development, the fastest and most effiecient ways of achieving your goals, everytime being sure that this is it, this is the information or the knowledge or the tool I was missing, and if I follow this I can have everything I have ever wanted. After each break down being sure that I have learned all there is to learn and nothing can affect me or harm anymore. And yet the more I wanted something the further away from me would my wish go. Than I got in a point that I was convienced that all that is material is bad and the only pursuit worth going must be spiritual, so of course I went for the greatest spiritual pursuit: enlightnment and spiritual awakening. I did not go far with this one, as the person I really liked just decided that he wants to be with me, and as enlightnment and a relationship can’t go together I had to decide between the two. The decision was not so difficult, as I was anyway still attached on material matters and didn’t understand to well the concept of enlightnment, even thow I start reading about it, cos’ what we do when we are going to our next new thing? we read a book, preferrably the best rated one on amazon or ebay:) and than we think we know so much. The human mind (or rather ego) is for sure funny and plays with us in many ways if we listen to everything it says. And what was my ego saying? If you are on this planet in human form, you should enjoy all things available in the world. Starting more spiritual practices doesn’t go too well with material posessions, with relationships, with having a family, you have to let all go. But for sure you have time for this after you die. I am a spirit in human form which has the power to come in the human dimesnsion everytime it wants, as I understood it from the Tibetan Budhism book about reincarnations. So, enlightnment after I die or maybe when I am old I’ll have time for it:)


After this, I reached a point when I saw nothing good in my life, no possibilities, no chance for changing and I was totally depressed and sure that there is no point to start anything in my life, any realation, to have any goal, because none of these is going to make me happy. I felt empty,  had no desires, no wants, no plans, nothing that I could think of could make me excited, I felt there is no purpose of the mind, of the body, of the soul. I just wanted to stop being.

Than I understood that the change must happend inside, because no matter how much I would try to change external conditions, no matter in which country I would move, no matter how many friends I would change, no matter how many things I would give up, I still have to deal with my internal fears, judgements and negative beliefs, that will follow me no matter where I would run. In the end we are not running of the situations and bad conditions, we are running from ourselves. The only problem is that the ego will always follow us, because we are in a deep love relationship with the ego. Than, letting it go can be devastating and heartbreathing. When we finish a love relationship the ego is devasted, because it means this means so many things for the ego: it means that I was not good enough, it means that I was not important, that I am not meaningful. Only that the true self is meaningful just by it’s mere existence. There is no confirmation that I need from the others, no admiration, no love that I need from the others to know that I am meaningful and I am an important and extraordinary human being.

There is so much resistance inside of us, resistance of the ego that is stopping us to be what we want to be, that is stopping us to feel free, that is stopping us to be happy. And yet, the ego is necessary, because it is the only way we can diferentiate the truth from the false, and is the only way to find out the truth and the authentic.


What should my next goal be?:)

There is a saying: Whatever you decide to do make sure it will make you happy!

Than I decide to just be happy, and my ultimate goal is: happiness, love, peace and joy. How I am going to do this? I don’t know. I just know that when I focus on these states and I am thinking that these are the goals in life I feel free and I don’t feel the stress and pressure that I felt when my goals were: a car, a house, money, a career, or a relationship.


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Is the world in a chronic depression?

Today I was in the bus coming back home, feeling totally scaterred, depressed and without purpose; deep feelings which I didn’t have in a very long time. Being so focused on my own thoughts and mind I didn’t even notice the other people around me. When I realize the other people I kind of felt ashamed because of my depressive thoughts, thinking that the other people are much happier than  me. And yet when I started to observe the people around me I noticed that every single person was in its mind, with their own thoughts, nobody connecting, nobody looking at each other, nobody talking, they all looked depressed and like they were having the worst day of their lives. It’s like we were all together in the same place, but yet separated by invisible boxes, each one living in their own box.

Is this normal? Is this how people should treat each other and themselves? Is it like this every single day?Aren’t we part of the same tapestry?Aren’t we in this world together?Aren’t we made from the same material?Aren’t we all spiritually connected? Why is it not normal to talk to strangers in the bus and ask them how they are, how their day was? Isn’t the purpose of life: love, joy and happiness? In what kind of world are we living? Since when is the world in a chronic depression? Should we not be grateful and happy just for the fact that we are alive and we can breathe the same air? Should we not be happy just to see other people no matter who they are?

I didn’t have these questions in a long time. When I was a little girl I remember I had these questions every time I saw people angry, every time I saw people sad, every time my parents were arguing, every time they were not satisfaied with their condition. And every time I felt sad and I wanted to change the situation, because it is just not possible for me to understand why people are not happy and joyful all the time, why is their mood changing. And I would have gave everything just to see them happy.

Once I grow up I accepted that this is how world works, after being disapointed over and over again, than got integrated in the “system” and didn’t ask questions anymore.

And yet I truly believe it is not a natural state of mind and I can feel it in every cell of my body and I always did. Depression should not be the dominating state of so many people, it should rather be an exception than a rule.

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About the hearth

In my pursue of learning and finding personal development resources, I found out about a non-profit research institute, a little more unusual, called The HeartMath Institute. They make research about the energy generated by our heart an its wonders. But, we are not talking about the organ itself, but about the area located in the center of the chest and around it, the so called 4th chakra or the heart chakra. The most important concept they talk about is heart-coherence, which means bringing the mind and emotions into coeherent alingnment with the heart. In other words, not living so much in our heads, but thinking with the heart. The benefits are amazing: clear thinking, proper imune system, calmness, and increased levels of energy. How to achieve this? on the HeartMath website you can find free exercises, videos, articles, pdfs, e-books and other resources. One great exercise is this one:Institute of HeartMath. I do it every morning and I see great results: increased energy level, easier to find solutions, to be more postive and to see the bright side in each experience.

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